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Pregnant Pause | |
by Bernadette Noll |
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In the next few months my body began to accept its new form as
standard. I'd told everyone I could think of. Any answers to inquiries about my new status were mind-numbingly mundane. "Fine, fine. I really feel great. Nope, I'm not showing yet," I would say as I arched my back and displayed my not-much-rounder-than-usual belly.
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I was a bit thicker around the middle. A woman with a protruding
paunch, yes, but not a woman with child. The initial rush of excitement ebbed and I began to doubt the existence of our infant. I was presiding in a pregnant pause.
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And then I had the sonogram. The doctor poked and probed and turned the sonogram's screen towards Kenny and me. Just as I expected, I saw a gray-scale fuzzy blob on the screen. The doctor "uh-huhed" and "okayed," all the while staring intently at the monitor. Trying to ignore my compromising
position I made a somewhat feeble attempt at conversation. Suddenly the doctor bellowed, "There it is!" Knowing that he had done this hundreds of times before, I was a bit astonished at his glee. I turned to the monitor and was struck speechless as I ogled, tear-filled and wide-eyed, the vision of our wee one swimming in my womb. |
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It was at this moment that my limbo lifted. There on the screen, was
neither a blob nor a fuzzy lump but an honest-to-goodness babe, not yet
complete in its formation, but on its way without a doubt. The doctor used an arrow to point out the tiny head with giant, alien-shaped eye sockets. Lilliputian arms protruded from the petite body. Skinny little legs kicked so voraciously that the doctor couldn't measure our wee one's length. Pulsing furiously inside this little pear was the heart — our little sweetheart that we were seeing for the first time.
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back to motherhood
Bernadette Noll is a freelance writer based in Austin, Texas. On being a full-time writer, she says, "My life is forever colored by ten years in the restaurant business. It's always in the back of my mind that there is only one letter difference between writer and waiter." Her first child is due in October.
© 1997 Tripod, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
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