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Like many parts of the country, New Orleans has its own language. You'll figure that out quickly - the first time you ask for directions. Nobody seems to use cardinal directions in New Orleans; they refer to everything in terms of the river and the lake. Buildings are on the "river side" or the "lake side" of the street; uptown  and downtown  mean, literally, "upstream" and "downstream." When looking for houses you'll find listings under the headings "Above Canal" and "Below Canal." That means upstream and downstream of Canal Street. What would be the west bank of a river that flows north to south is still the West Bank down here, regardless of whether its south or east of the East Bank. Sound scary? Just keep the curvy Mississippi in mind and you'll muddle through New Orleans navigation intact. But try to superimpose north and south on top of everything and you'll only wind up confused.

It's good to have a handle on other New Orleans language eccentricities, many of which center on the culinary. The true test of any town, of course, is: What do they call a submarine sandwich? Down here, it's a "po-boy," a Southernized version of "poor-boy." Shrimp, oyster, and catfish po-boys are probably the most popular New Orleans sandwiches, but you can get a po-boy with just about anything inside. Some po-boy shops have been known to serve such delicacies as the French fry po-boy; you can probably guess the ingredients.

When ordering a po boy - or a sandwich, or a hamburger, or anything between two slices of bread - you'll likely be asked whether you want it "dressed." That generally means topped with lettuce, tomato and mayonnaise. A note to Northeasterners: if you don't want mayonnaise, ask them to keep it off. Another food ordering note: iced tea down here is "tea." Sweetened iced tea is "sweet tea." And a "snowball," a common summer delicacy down here, is the New Orleans version of the snow cone.

Another thing to remember while driving: the strip between two sides of the road, known everywhere else as a median , is a "neutral ground" in New Orleans. Between neutral grounds and the West Bank, you might think you're in the Middle East. But, down here in the Gulf Coast, you'd never have something called the Golan Heights ... there are no hills to be found.