Question 8

Tripod: I understand that with many types of contraceptives, it's good to use some type of spermicidal lubricant. Play out a situation for me, where getting out that ugly tube and squeezing out that junk becomes part of the buildup to sex.
Do you have an answer to share? Click on the question.

Lydia
Female Escort

Personally, I don't use spermicide. Because I'm allergic to it. But I think they're very sensual. If I was going to get the tube out, I would very sensually sit there and go through applying it to myself, in front of my partner, in a very sensual and sexual way, for which he'd be really turned on. I can get dirtier on that one-- but I'm being taped, so I won't!

John Troyer
Creator of the Safer Sex Page

Oh, absolutely. Nonoxynol Nine is the standard use. In fact for HIV protection, Monoxal Nine has never been shown to help. Also, many people are allergic to it, and it's not great for oral sex -- it makes your tongue numb. People should be aware that there are non-spermicidal lubricants they can use. But anyway, using spermicide, or any other sort of lubricant, is a great way of starting you along the whole process. Pulling up the condom, or having your partner put it on you, or putting it on together -- it's a great way.

Susan Yates
Gynecologist

Yeah. As I was saying before, the concept of incorporating your contraceptives into your foreplay can be exciting because it is a part of that buildup. And I think that anything that can be part of that anticipation of the event can improve the sexual act itself. I think you have to approach it with humor, and with intimacy.

Bob
Straight Male

This is completely confidential -- it's been used for, you know, anal sex. It makes it more comfortable for her.

Kyoko Okamura
Harvard Peer Counselor

It depends on the person. Myself, I'm like, "Hold on, let me just get some more lube because I'm pretty dry." It's not that awkward for me, probably because I'm used to working with things like this. But I could totally see, especially using the foam, that it could be extremely awkward. The foam is not conventional. You have to get the applicator, and then put it inside you. To make that exciting depends on personal taste. I don't use the foam because it is awkward for me. But with the tube, it's not a big deal because you can put it on the penis, and make that into something pleasurable for him and for yourself. There's so much stuff out there -- you can get flavored condoms and flavored lubricants. I don't know about the financial situation, though!

Michael Franz, Gay Male
Editor, Gaysource

I always keep it, whenever I would have a partner come over, whenever I know there's going to be a sexual situation, I keep the lube and the contraceptives next to the bed, so it's within easy reach. Basically, there's a lot of foreplay. You build up to the moment. You're ready for intercourse, and one or the other just reaches over. And it can actually be a real erotic moment, especially if the person who's going to be on top reaches over, grabs it and starts to apply it -- just kind of takes control of the situation. That can be an extremely erotic moment. They're showing that they want you.

Map | Search | Help | Send Us Comments

LydiaFemale Escort

John TroyerCreator of the Safer Sex Page

Susan YatesGynecologist

BobStraight Male