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From Bob Galloway, Software Engineer:
EXCITE: Okay, what to write about... I could write about how much it sucks that the guy at Tripod who took care of the infinity of little tech jobs is gone (we'll miss you Jeff), but that would be whining. I could write about Starcraft, but anybody who'd be interested already knows what a kickass game that is, and the rest of you would click off to something else. I could write about summer movies, and how rarely any of them are worth watching, but, again, that'd be whining.LYCOS: So I asked my girlfriend. "What the heck should I write about? I gotta do this Letter from Tripod thing, Randy's been pestering me about it for the last two weeks, and I've been so hung up on the Past-Due Project (and Starcraft) that I can't think of a thing. What do you suggest?"
SNAP: "Why don't you write about boogers," she suggested. "Or navels."
YAHOO: Okay, so there's these things called boogers, and they're not usually acceptable in polite company. That's really too bad, since they make a nice substitute for paste in second grade art projects (this I know), and they're usually good for getting rid of germs and stuff. They're also a pretty good second grade insult. I think boogers should lose their unfair outcast status in our society, and reclaim their rightful place amongst the ear wax and fingernail clippings.
ALTAVISTA: Navels are a different story altogether. They've already taken a commanding lead on boogers in the social assimilation department, expanding their influence from their long-established dominance of the swimming scene to the lucrative mall-walking female bare tummy market. And like any social climber, navels don't want to have anything to do with boogers anymore; it's not often that a navel will welcome a booger into its home.
HOTBOT: Some people think that boogers and navels are allegories for something else. I disagree; but if you want to investigate the matter further, you know where to go.
Read more "Letters from Tripod" in the archive.
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