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The Usefulness of Peeps:
It is just amazing what Peeps can help you do. And it can be quite disgusting...
FIRST PRIZE
leia_1:
i would never have survived finals had it not been for peeps. those wonderful sugar-coated fluffy things. it was just before the end of the semester, and i was burnt out.
it was 3am, and i had a huge anthropology final in less than twelve hours...i needed something to keep me awake, and, not being a coffee person, i had already downed two pots of earl grey tea. I NEEDED SOMETHING MORE POTENT!!!
so i set out for the 24-hour convenience store...armed with my last two bucks until pay day...i was desperate!!
i perused the aisles for several minutes, and nothing struck my fancy...i was sick of doritos...cheetos...potato chips, twizzlers...the usual stay-up-all-night sort of stuff.
i was just about to give up... i was walking out the door when i saw it: a clearance rack with several packages of PEEPS!!!!!! bunnies! chicks!! and there were TWO colors left, too!!!! i bought them all..they were discounted enough that i even had a dollar left!
i took them home with a renewed sense of motivation. i tore open the first package as soon as i was out the door of the store and wolfed down two chicks. they were stale..and we're not talking about plain old slightly-chewy peeps here..we're talking antique- first-ever-package-of-peeps kind of stale...but it didn't matter. the sugar rush hit me almost instantaneously! by the time i walked home, i'd devoured an entire row.
over the course of the next three hours, i consumed a total of about 40 peeps... i didn't even bother going to bed before my anthropology final. i spent the wee hours of the morning studying, making cocoa and dipping peeps in it, and putting peeps in the microwave and watching them blow up and melt, then eating them....
i was so hyper that i was practically bouncing off the walls like a gas molecule by the time it came time to take the exam. despite the almost audible buzz i had from the sugar rush, i was able to complete the exam in record time.
i got an A!
now, every springtime, i stock up on peeps the day after easter, when they go on sale really cheap..and they last me for as long as i need them.
THANK YOU, PEEPS!!!
HONORABLE MENTIONS
jbootay:
Some Peep excuses as a child:
* my Peep ate it!
*"daddy Peep wants to know are we there yet?"
*"buutt..Peep said he thought there were more Easter eggs for me!"
Some Peep excuses i use now:
*"hey baby wanna come back to my place for some Peeps - we've got purple!"
*"HI i couldn't help but notice you bought yellow peeps too!"
Peep insults:
*What the P!E$E*P!!
*Peep you!
*PEEP OFF!!
*OH peep!
New versatile Peeps: "You'll be amazed as they soak up spills, get to that annoying ear wax, and just add water and watch them work like glue! And now....NEW - Diet PEEP!! Watch out for the upcoming Radioactive "GLOW IN THE DARK PEEP!" And you'll be amazed by the cartoon adventures of "PEEPMAN!" he has nerves of sugar and a goey heart..a family show for all occasions!
hhofert:
As a result of my mother's confused recollection that Peeps were my favorite Easter treat, my friends and I often found ourselves with packages of peeps and nowhere to go. Our creative minds soon found uses for these marshmallow wonders. They make wonderful decorations for car antennas, and why not spread the joy of Peeps to an entire parking lot? Their ornamental and adhesive qualities also make them perfect for door handles. Who wouldn't enjoy the soft, warm feeling of a Peep cushioning your hand from cold, hard metal? And don't forget the splendid splat of a Peep encountering the helmet of a passing biker. The next time you find yourself with a box of Peeps, spread the love...spread the Peeps!
Krba:
What do you do if you find the perfect pair of shoes, but they're a little on the large side? Use Peeps! Any kind will do. Just pack them into the toe or heel of that shoe, and voila! Peeps also make great odor-eaters and sweat-absorbers for shoes. Not only that, but you can eat them afterward! Yum!
Karmella:
Peeps have proved to be a valuable resource in my kitchen. Unfortunately, the folks down at the Peeps factory have never offered any serving suggestions for these chewy little critters...so I made up a few of my own:
1. Who needs mini-marshmallows when you can melt colorful Peeps into your Rice Crispies Treats recipe!
2. Tired of the same old bread-crumb stuffing in your Easter Turkey? Create a party inside your turkey where little yellow chicks mingle with pink bunnies.
3. Peeps make a splendid spring-time garnish for all foods.
4. Alternate little chicks, bunnies, and pre-grilled meat on a skewer...Peep-kabob, anyone? (warning, grill the meat FIRST... Peeps aren't very pretty after grilling)
5. Don't throw away those stale, rock-hard Peeps! After a little chop here and there, you'll have delightfully colorful croutons. They bring more dazzle to that boring salad, they have the same crunchy texture...and picky eaters won't know the difference.
cellini:
My grandfather saw the Easter basket lined with peeps and asked us what they were. When he found out, not being a cussing man, he discovered a new use for the word "peep." He was trying to set an example for us kids. One day I overheard him arguing with an insurance salesman. Grandpa had had enough of his high pressure tactics. So he yelled, "Get your peeppeep peep out of here. And take your peeping policies with you. All you do is sit on your peep all day trying to figure out how to cheat us old folks." "I work hard, harder than you." "My peep you do. I should kick your peep for being such a peeping liar. Now take your motherpeeping trash and get your peep out of here. You're a peephole if I ever saw one."
daisy25:
I always had a thing for peeps. I just didn't know they could save my life. It started out a warm October day, and just like any other, I'd settled down for a nice round of some trailer-park trash fighting on Jerry Springer, when all of a sudden, it hit me like a rod of beef jerky. Not a newsflash or an idea, but someone was calling. I picked up the phone. As usual, more usual than for my taste, it was a national catalogue company trying to get me to buy something (if you bought right then you'd get a set of dishpans as a bonus!!). Thinking of nothing else, I spied the box of PEEPS my neighbor had given me the previous Easter. I was afraid, very afraid, of the box of aged confections, but I had no choice. I ripped the cellophane open, shoved a big ole pink PEEP in my mouth and managed to get the words out that I couldn't talk to the salesman due to dental surgery. That was the last phone call I ever had from said company. I don't know if they knew I was faking or not, but I don't care. I'm a PEEPS fan for life!
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