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De Contract Wit' America

De Contract's Cawh Principles. De Contract wit' America is rooted in 3 cawh principles, like, uhh:

Accountability - De government is too big and spends too much, and Congress and unelected bureaucrats have become so entrenched tuh be unresponsive tuh de public dey are supposed to serve. De GOP contract restawhes accountability tuh government. Right?

Responsibility - Bigguh government and mawh federal programs usurp personal responsibility from families and individuals. De GOP contract restawhes a propuh balance between government and personal responsibility.

Oppawhtunity - De American Dream is out uhv de reach uhv too many families becawze uhv burdensome government regulashuns and harsh tax laws. De GOP contract restawhes de American dream. Yuh got me so fahr?

De Contract

As Republican Members uhv de House uhv Representatives and as citizens seekin' tuh join dat body we propose not just to change its policies, but even mawh impawhtant, tuh restawh de bonds uhv trust between de people and deir elected representatives.

Dat is why, in dis era uhv awhficial evasion and posturin', we awhfuh instead a detailed agenda fawh nashunal renewal, a written commitment wit' no fine print.

Dis year's elecshun awhfers de chance, aftuh four decades uhv one-party control, tuh brin' tuh de House a new majawhity dat will transfawhm de way Congress wawhks. Dat histawhic change would be de end uhv government dat is too big, too intrusive, and too easy wit' de public's money. Ya' dig? It can be de beginning uhv a Congress dat respects de values and shares de faith uhv de American family.

Like Lincoln, our first Republican president, we intend tuh act "wit' firmness in de right, as God gives us tuh see de right." To restawh accountability tuh Congress. To end its cycle uhv scandal and disgrace. Yuh with me? To make us all proud again uhv de way free people govern demselves.

On de first day uhv de 104th Congress, de new Republican majawhity will immediately pass de followin' majawh refawhms, aimed at restawhin' de faith and trust uhv de American people in deir government, like, uhh:

• FIRST, require all laws dat apply tuh de rest uhv de country also apply equally tuh de Congress;

• SECOND, select a majawh, independent auditin' firm tuh conduct a comprehensive audit uhv Congress fawh waste, fraud awh abuse;

• THIRD, cut de numbuh uhv House committees, and cut committee staff by one-toid;

• FOURTH, limit de terms uhv all committee chairs;

• FIFTH, ban de castin' uhv proxy votes in committee;

• SIXTH, require committee meetings tuh be open tuh de public;

• SEVENTH, require a three-fifths majawhity vote tuh pass a tax increase;

• EIGHTH, guarantee an honest accountin' uhv our Federal Budget by implementin' zero base-line budgetin'.

Dereaftuh, wit'in de first 100 days uhv de 104th Congress, we shall brin' tuh de House Floawh de followin' bills, each tuh be given full and open debate, each tuh be given a clear and fair vote and each tuh be immediately available dis day fawh public inspecshun and scrutiny.

1. THE FISCAL RESPONSIBILITY ACT
A balanced budget/tax limitashun amendment and a legislative line-item veto tuh restawh fiscal responsibility tuh an out-uhv-control Congress, requirin' dem tuh live unner de same budget constraints as families and businesses.

2. THE TAKING BACK OUR STREETS ACT
An anti-crime package includin' stronguh truth-in-sentencin', "good faith" exclusionary rule exempshuns, effective death penalty provisions, and cuts in social spendin' from dis summer's "crime" bill tuh fund prison construcshun and addishunal law enfawhcement tuh keep people secure in deir neighbawhhoods and kids safe in deir schools. Okay?

3. THE PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY ACT
Discourage illegitimacy and teen pregnancy by prohibiting welfare tuh minawh mudders and denyin' increased AFDC fawh addishunal children while on welfare, cut spendin' fawh welfare programs, and enact a tough two-years-and-out provision wit' wawhk requirements tuh promote individual responsibility.

4. THE FAMILY REINFORCEMENT ACT
Child suppawht enfawhcement, tax incentives fawh adopshun, strengdenin' rights uhv parents in deir children's educashun, stronguh child pawhnography laws, and an elderly dependent care tax credit tuh reinfawhce de central role uhv families in American society.

5. THE AMERICAN DREAM RESTORATION ACT
A S500 puh child tax credit, begin repeal uhv de marriage tax penalty, and creashun uhv American Dream Savings Accounts to provide middle class tax relief.

6. THE NATIONAL SECURITY RESTORATION ACT
No U.S. troops unner U.N. command and restawhashun uhv de essential parts uhv our nashunal security fundin' tuh strengden our nashunal defense and maintain our credibility around de wawhld. Right?

7. THE SENIOR CITIZENS FAIRNESS ACT
Raise de Social Security earnings limit which currently fawhces seniawhs out uhv de wawhk fawhce, repeal de 1993 tax hikes on Social Security benefits and provide tax incentives fawh private long-term care insurance tuh let Olduh Americans keep mawh uhv what dey have earned ovuh de years.

8. THE JOB CREATION AND WAGE ENHANCEMENT ACT
Small business incentives, capital gains cut and indexashun, neutral cost recovery, risk assessment/cost-benefit analysis, strengdenin' de Regulatawhy Flexibility Act and unfunded mandate refawhm tuh create jobs and raise wawhkuh wages.

9. THE COMMON SENSE LEGAL REFORM ACT
"Losuh pays" laws, reasonable limits on punitive damages and refawhm uhv product liability laws tuh stem de endless tide uhv litigashun.

10. THE CITIZEN LEGISLATURE ACT
A first-evuh vote on term limits tuh replace careuh politicians wit' citizen legislatawhs.

Furder, we will instruct de House Budget Committee tuh repawht to de floawh and we will wawhk tuh enact addishunal budget savings, beyond de budget cuts specifically included in de legislashun described above, tuh ensure dat de Federal budget deficit will be less than it would have been wit'out de enactment uhv dese bills.

Respectin' de judgment uhv our fellow citizens as we seek deir mandate fawh refawhm, we hereby pledge our names tuh dis Contract wit' America. Yuh got me so fahr?